JUICE CLEANSE

I knocked.
Didn’t want them calling the police.
I was peeking in.
Stalking the house I grew up in.
We lived in NY until I was 8.
We hid a kitten under a laundry basket until Mom said we could keep it.
In that house.
My sister started smoking and set the toilet seat on fire.
In that house.
Happy flashbacks.
Except for the boys on the bus.
On the way to Saint Agnes school…
They’d sing a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad (remember I was 8) version of The Addams Family theme.
Everyday.
About every family.
When they got to mine…
I cried.
Every time.
“The Lucey family started…
When Mr Lucey farted.
The children are…”
A word that rhymes with farted.
A word we no longer use to describe the mentally challenged.
Anyway…
If that’s the worst memory…
You can go home again.
The woman who lives in the house invited us in.
I was in a New York State of memories.
We left NY when I was kid.
As an adult (?) I moved back.
I worked at WABC with Regis.
Then NBC.
My husband worked at WCBS.
Each street reminds me of a story.
Or a story I covered.
Like interviewing Madonna at the Limelight.
Or Jane Velez-Mitchell and I stumbling out of a bar and into Lionel Richie’s car.
I share these stores with my son.
Who says…
“How many days till you drop me at college?”
You still have 25 days dude.
Until our family of 3…
Becomes a party of 2.
Speaking of 2.
My husband & I were meeting a friend for coffee.
He texts me.
We’re at the Starbucks at 53rd & 6th.
This is the actual text conversation that ensued.
Me: Where you?
Him: Told you. Starbucks 53rd & 6th.
Me: Don’t see you.
Him: I’m standing out front.
Me: I’m standing out front of the Starbucks at 53rd & 6th.
Him: (bitchy) I thought you knew the city.
Me: I promise you. You are not standing out front of the Starbucks at 53rd & 6th.
As I take a photo of the street sign to show him…
I see…
A Starbucks.
Across the street.
There are 2 Starbucks at 53rd & 6th.
Only in NYC.
Fully caffeinated
We’re off on our 2 state 2 family tour.
A 4 hour drive.
To see…
2 babies.
4 dogs.
Then a 2 hour drive to see…
2 dogs.
4 cousins.
We saw 22 family members.
Not that I’m counting.
OK I was.
So was my son.
Literally…
Counting the days till college.
It’s now down to 23 days.
But for 8 days…
We drank, laughed and mostly ate with 2 families in 2 states.
Remember how I gave up sugar and lost weight?
Forget that.
Apparently…
You can go home again.
But now I need a juice cleanse.