JOAN RIVERS, BONO and MY BRA.

I’ve been cleaning up stuff.

Or more like moving it around.

I’ve been looking for a photo of Joan Rivers.

An old photo of Joan and me at the Emmys.

I had on a dress that I was stupid enough to buy. Now I rent.

I’m in my expensive dress thinking thoughts I never have.

Thinking…

I look good.

I love this dress.

I bet Joan loves this dress.

My dress had the face of a frickin tiger on it.

Joan had to notice it.

Joan did notice something.

She noticed my bra was showing.

Nothing like Joan mentioning your unmentionables.

I just hope my bra was clean.

I know I have a photo of that moment.

But I can’t find it.

I may have left it in my desk at my old show.

I did leave there in a hurry.

I wasn’t fired and escorted out the door as some people have been.

But I probably left a few things while leaving.

While searching for Joan I found a bunch of old wedding photos.

My anniversary was last week. My Maid of Honor was visiting me from DC.  She was a hot red-head then and she’s a hot red-head now.

I was a red-head when I got married. After a few months I went back to blonde. My husband never noticed.

Kim (the said hot red-head) my husband and I all went to college together.

Kim and I were roommates.

Back then David had a ménage au college fantasy.

I’m not sure either one of us is his fantasy now. But after she cooked for us he knows he married the wrong roommate.

I spent part of my anniversary with David, Kim and Bono.

After writing an entire blog about not seeing Bono… I saw him.

Twice, actually.

Twice in one week.

He may be stalking me.

I’ll only bore you with one story.

I was enjoying my anniversary dinner with my husband.

Kim and other friends were at a bar. They texted me that U2 was there. There was a rumor they might play something.

David and I finished dinner.

I sulked.

David said go be a groupie.

I did.

They didn’t play.

But it was fun to see Bono dance (Swinging to the Music. Swinging to the music. Hello hello Hola!) when someone did a bad karaoke version of Vertigo.

Who knew they were on their way to Cupertino. To rock the world with a free CD.

I’m listening to it now.

Actually I’m listening to one song (Every Breaking Wave) over and over.

At what I now call Café HaBono he was wearing a hat.  My friends said he looked like the guy from Curious George.  The Man in the yellow hat.

Only a rock star can rock a dorky hat and look hot.

So I got my hall pass. My anniversary gift was permission to ditch my husband to see Bono.

Who says the romance is gone after 20 years?

And I’m getting a new dishwasher. Sadly that’s my real gift.

My niece got married recently. She asked me for an unusual gift.  My Niece makes most of my jewelry ( nineteenpieces.com  yes Hannah, that’s your plug).

Hannah asked to meet Joan Rivers.

It’s the only thing she wanted.

We gave her money instead.

I said you can’t register for Joan.

I said this would be easier if I was on TV and saw Joan regularly.

I said I can’t gift wrap Joan,…but I will try.

And I did try…

But now Joan is gone.

I can’t give Hannah her wedding gift.

I can’t even find my favorite photo with Joan.

But I will think of Joan every time my bra is showing.