My Somewhat Inappropriate Travel Guide. Prague, Budapest, Vienna, Amsterdam

I got a jumpsuit.
It’s a onesie for grownups.
Easy for travel.
Except when you need to pee.
Especially on the train.
Some people (by people I mean men) have bad aim on the train.
I was the girl on the train.
Traveling from Prague to Budapest to Vienna to Prague.
Can not even calculate how many trips to the potty.
Mr G and I were taking Nash to school…in Prague.
He’s doing a semester abroad.
I want to be a college kid.
Traveling Europe.
By bus.
Staying in hostels.
OK maybe not.
But I do love to travel.
I sightsee like it’s a job.
Mr G is more of a have a beer and take in the atmosphere kind of guy.
I’m surprised we’re still married after 3 cities.
Actually 4.
We had a 5 hour lay over in Amsterdam.
So we took the train into the city for an hour.
Our first stop was Prague.
We dropped Nash off.
And when I say dropped off…
I mean we hung around his room and his friends till he practically begged us to leave the country.
We took the train (with the sticky bathroom floor) to Budapest.
I dragged Mr G to the bathhouse in Budapest.
Somehow he did not want to bathe with hundreds of people.
But it’s what you do in Budapest.
The Szechenyi bathhouse is 100 years old.
It has 18 thermal pools.
Since it was raining we got as wet as you can get.
That night we took a romantic boat ride on the Danube.
With a baby on board who cried the entire time.
Next morning we took the train to Vienna.
A city filled with rooftop bars.
My kind of town.
Strolling through the Imperial Treasury I found a treasure.
A thorn from the Crown of Thorns.
Steve Ed doesn’t call me Church Lady for nothing.
We only had one day in Vienna.
And I had one more church to see.
The next morning I walked to St Stephen’s Cathedral.
I wanted to climb the bell tower.
It opens at 9.
We had to leave by 9:45 for the train.
I had trained by climbing bell towers in Prague & Budapest.
But this one has 343 steps.
The struggles I’m facing…
The chances I’m taking…
I started singing a little Miley Cyrus.
But since I was in Austria, and Sound of Music adjacent…
I switched to Climb Every Mountain (or bell tower).
Going up I was alone on the tiny, winding staircase.
Going down it was the 405.
I had to flatten like a pancake when the masses passed me on their way up.
Then I had to race to the train.
That took care of last night’s dessert.
If you don’t order dessert in Vienna they think you have issues.
We took the train back to Prague.
Said goodbye to Nash.
And to the endless supply of cheese pastries.
They eat some weird shit in Prague.
Like pork knee.
So I pretty much stuck to pastries.
But we reluctantly left Prague.
And flew to Amsterdam.
Took the train into the city.
We were only there for an hour.
But managed to see the red light district and a couple of canals.
Wham Bam Amsterdam.
And then we were back on the train, to the plane, to head home.
Once again I was in my comfy onsie.
But thankfully people (men) seem to pee in the toilet on the plane.